Before The War Came

a homesickness for a home to which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was; the nostalgia, the grief, the yearning for the lost spaces of your past.

“Go back to where you came from!”
I wish I could.
But my home is burning.
And I’m aching for the beautiful place my home once was.
There is a name for this feeling.
Hiraeth. It’s Welsh.
A foreign word for a foreign person.
“You are Dirty!” “Immigrants!” “Job stealers!””Refugees!”
My blood is tainted by my foreignness.
Maybe that’s the dirt you’re talking about.
I wish I had an answer for you.
But I’m drowning in nostalgia.
My dreams are invaded by images of my home.
The way my home has been invaded by war.
In this state of daydreaming,
I’m sorry if I accidentally bump into you
I’m sorry if that makes you jump out of your skin
And scream ‘Terrorist!’
I’m not the terrorist. I’m an innocent victim.
Not victim. A survivor.
A part of me want to tell you how right you are to be afraid of us.
We have survived so much. Just like my home.
Death, destruction, sabotage, decay, guilts, regrets.
Hiraeth. Not just mere homesickness. A yearning.
I wish my hiraeth was strong enough to undo the past and go back to the home of my dreams.
Before the war came.

46 thoughts on “Before The War Came

  1. Anam!! Stunning poetry. Heart breaking that we as a race are capable both of creating such situations, then declaring we have ‘compassion fatigue’. Or, like Mr potato head trump, declaring refugees terrorists after destroying their homes. Or Netanyahooligan for that matter.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. Many thanks, Anam! You write so beautifully … I fully expect to see your books of poetry on the front shelves at the book shop someday, and I will say … “I knew her when … ” Hugs! ❤

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Reblogged this on Filosofa's Word and commented:

    Some time ago … I believe it was early in 2016, I discovered a blogger from India by the name of Anam, writing as Love Read Dream. Anam is very young (17-18) but wise beyond her years. She is at times funny, other times pensive, but she writes as well as any I have read. A few days ago I read a poem she wrote titled Before the War Came, and I was so touched by her words that I wanted to share it with my readers. Please allow me to introduce this beautiful young lady and her touching words. Thank you, Anam, for this hauntingly beautiful poem, and for your permission to share it with my friends.

    Liked by 2 people

  3. A beautiful heartfelt poem Anam. Thank you for using my language to describe your feeling of longing. Hiraeth, I know the feeling well but did manage to return home again as I hope you will one day if that’s your choice. To a land free of the evils of war where you may lay Hiraeth to rest.
    xxx Massive Hugs xxx

    Liked by 2 people

  4. A wonderfully evocative invoking a pain we should all take time to understand.
    You have a promising future in writing poetry.
    Best wishes

    Liked by 3 people

  5. Dear Anam,

    May you never stop writing. This poem says so much with so few words. Your words speak for so it touches the heart and makes peoples want to hear more Your words are mightier than the sword..

    I simply can’t give you enough compliments to do justice to your work.

    Thank you for sharing your beautiful, haunting poem.

    Hugs, Gronda

    Liked by 1 person

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